I thought about weaving all these fragments into an intricate dance of foreshadowing and character development and um, other literary type stuff, but that sounded too much like work. So, have a bunch of randomness instead.

***

So, I made deviled eggs yesterday. D. came home from work Monday night, and said he'd promised to bring some deviled eggs to a potluck they're having at work on Thurs.

I wanted to be really pissy about it. What?? Deviled eggs??? I don't know how to devil an egg. I don't even like hardboiled eggs. Make them yourself!

But then I thought about it, and it really didn't seem like that much to ask. I mean, it could have been so much worse. He could have asked for real cooking. He could have not said anything till Thursday morning. So, I agreed to devil a few dozen eggs for him.

Note to Lynne: Someday soon, you're going to be out in the real world. Mom is probably going to try and offer you a copy of The Settlement Cookbook. The Settlement were somehow connected with Camp back in the day, so this is like our heritage, or our family cookbook, or something. Take the cookbook. Smile and nod. Never, ever, try to use it.

It's really the most useless cookbook I've ever seen. I always consult it first when I need a recipe, get pissed off at what I find, and have to listen to D. giggle at me and my heritage cookbook. This is not a healthy way to start a new cooking experience.

I've got a recipe for cottage cheese. I've got a recipe for tripe. This is the sort of thing I find when I try and look in the Settlement cookbook.

I finally found a recipe for deviled eggs. The recipe was enough to make four eggs. Yeah, I know how to do simple math. I could have extrapolated that info to come up with a recipe for the two dozen eggs I needed. But all that's in deviled eggs a la Settlement was mayonnaise and salt. That's not deviled, people. That's like egg salad with delusions of grandeur.

***

At one point today, I was experimenting with the idea of "uploading" the various "images" from the "dark magical belly" of my computer to somewhere on my old GeoCities page, and then using GeoCities as the "source." These are all technical terms, I swear. That's how we "web designers" talk. I learned so much today.

The point is, while I was at My First WebSite Ever I realized that quite possibly none of you had ever seen it. Go forth, and laugh at my template-abusing ass.

(Wow. I just realized what this is. It's yet another "Ana doesn't wanna write today, so go read stuff she wrote a long time ago instead." thing, nestled inside this one today. It's like some sort of recursive loop of sloth. Scary. --The Mgt.

***

"Before you begin installing your printer, make sure you print out a copy of these instructions..."

***

So, hi.

No, not much. How are you?

Yeah. Yup. Oh, definitely penguins.

You can't go wrong with a good penguin. That's what I always say.

Ok, you're right. I've never said that before in my life. I don't give a lot of thought to penguins, to be perfectly honest.

Well, what's wrong with being random? Non sequiteurs work, dammit. Chaos is comedy, my friend.

No, you shut up.

I don't care what you say. I think this entry is really going well. It's...experimental, ya see. The kids, they like the experimental.

Yeah, maybe. I'll admit, that is something I'm a little worried about. But you know what? Anyone says this is stupid, I'll just say they don't understand it. It's pretty heavy stuff I'm playing with here. I'm groundbreaking. I'm all metaphorical and shit.

It is so metaphorical. You're just not thinking about it the right way. Everything is really a metaphor, if you think about it long enough.

Now you've distracted me. What was I talking about?

No, I don't think that was a painfully obvious clue to what's really going on. I am oozing with subtlety here.

In fact, I'm so subtle, I don't even need to finish this.

(It may interest you to know that I actually found this over @ the HAT. I don't even remember writing it, but the original title seems to have been "The Stone it Called to Me." which at the time, I probably thought was Symbolic. Or, maybe that's only interesting to me. --The Mgt.)

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