And, then I'll come home and pay some bills, and be poor again for another two weeks. Sigh. In about two years, I'll have spending money.

My tax return will be decent, but that's mostly spent already too. George needs shots, the car needs oil, I need birth control. I want a printer cartridge and new socks and something else that I can't remember offhand. (Curtains would be nice. Just now, I taped a piece of paper to the exact spot where sunlight was hitting my monitor screen through the venetian blinds. I must type quickly now, before the sun's angle changes too much and I have to move the paper.) All of that leaves me with roughly $300, and I really want a couch. I'm thinking of spending no more than $100 on a used couch, so I can then decide if I would rather have a new video card or a book orgy as my one "fun" thing out of all the extra money.

Money sucks.
***
And now for something completely different:

KC and I have come up with the most amazingly amazing plan ever.

Alcohol Relationship Therapists. Our slogan is, "A Shot of Reality." It's very simple. You pay us $100 per person, per hour, for a night of babysitting and catharsis.

We come to your house, with alcohol. Before getting started, all concerned parties will have presented us with a list of goals for the evening, and a list of completely taboo subjects. We provide the alcohol, and once your inhibitions are sufficently lowered, you get it all out in the open. Our job is to make sure none of the bad topics get broached, but all the things you really want to say but lack the nerve to say sober get said.

The idea still needs a lot of work. we should probably send two counselors on each assignment, just to keep everything as impartial as possible. Each counselling team should have one person brawny enough to take out either drinker, if necessary, and one trained relationship therapist. Also, both counselors will need to be licensed bartenders who have taken the "responsible beverage service" class. We want to help people, not put them in comas.

As part of the application process, you must submit your height, weight, preferred beverage, and standard alcohol consumption. We will review the goals and taboos of each participant, and determine whether or not we can help.

It wasn't part of the original discussion, but it's just now occured to me, this might make a great reality TV show. Would you watch total strangers get stupidly drunk and reveal their deepest feelings? Even if you won't admit that you would enjoy that sort of thing, I'm sure you know someone who would.

Hmm. Would making it televised discourage the people who need our services most from applying? The next time KC and I get drunk together, we will have to discuss this in more depth.

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