Yeah, I was a little confused too. In my world, I was at home, doing my own thing, and with no warning at all, The Man is suddenly interrogating me.

He was being so hardcore about it, too. I said I didn't know anything about it, and he was all, "Well, you'd better find out!!" What the hell? You're the officer here, bucko, not me. Is it now standard procedure to try and intimidate citizens into doing all your work for you?

Of course, I said none of this. I told him, as politely as I could, that I was more than willing to help the investigation in any way I could, and I'd ask my roommate about it when he got home. Then, I thought it would maybe help if I knew exactly what had gone down. I asked him when the door had been opened.

He said he would call me back.

So, wait. Hold everything for just one minute. You're telling me, Officer Friendly, that you don't even have all the facts of the alleged case yet, and you're calling me to try and get me to...to...do what again exactly?? YOUR JOB, maybe? Dude, I said I didn't do it. What more do you want from me?

10 minutes later, he called back. It happened Tuesday evening. I thanked him, and assured him again that I would ask my roommate about it as soon as I saw him.

When Rij got home, I asked him. Apparently, he had in fact opened her door a little, as part of the chair process. He thought it was a door to a storage closet or something, and he needed it open to maneuver the chair up the stairs to our apartment. She'd shouted at him, and he closed it. Then, for reasons known only to herself, she called the police about it two days later. Or, maybe she called that night, and it just took Chief Wiggum two days to find my phone number. No matter how I look at it, it just keeps getting stranger.

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