Hmm. Both of D's returns arrived today. Together, they will just about cover my insane debt to society. Damn the Man! (save the empire!)

D. called here while I was at work. I probably shouldn't be online at all just in case he calls back. I also left a messge on Anne's machine, asking her to call tonight. Before last week, no one ever called. My parents and Christine knew enough to send me e-mail when they want to reach me. For the first time in my life, I'm finding myself wishing I had a second line. Every day for the past week, I've been forced offline, because I was waiting for a phone call. It's a terrible burden, to be so damn popular. But, now I no longer seem to need to be constantly waiting for the car dealership to call, and maybe the Lynne situation will blow over soon. Then, I can go back to my peaceful hermitlike existance.

Hmm.

Nope. Nothing. Usually by this point, I've thought of something to say. I sometimes need a few paragraphs to warm up, but tonight, I really can't seem to think of a damn thing. Maybe I'll just keep stalling for a few minutes...

(Come to meee, come to meeeee...)

Ana lights a few candles, and sits nekkid in front of her computer. Nananananaaaaa! Nananananananaaaaa!

Narrator voiceover (dramatically whispered): This is a very ancient ceremony, but usually a private one. We are fortunate indeed to have caught it on tape.

Cut to Ana, who has begun smearing chicken entrails on her monitor.

VO: The "summon muse" ritual requires complete concentration. In extreme situations, the Ana has been known to forego cigarettes for up to 20 minutes, in order to purify herself for the coming ordeal.

Ana begins pacing backwards around her computer, muttering incoherently and making strange hand gestures.

VO: Yes, the "fertility of mind" dance. According to Anaian legend, Esolenos, the Highest God, must be awakened, and then consumed. The Ana believes not only creative freedom, but the success of the crops for the coming year is assured only by appeasing Esolenos. Now, this next step is very important. Watch closely, or you might miss it.

Ana lights a cigarette.

VO: (beat) Um, the cigarette represents not only Esolenos as a Promethean figure (the Bringer of Fire, which of course symbolizes Creativity), but also the Ana's own mortality.

Ana: What? What the hell was that supposed to mean?

VO: You don't like that? I thought it was pretty good.

Ana: Look, just because I happen to have chicken guts smeared all over my computer doesn't mean I'm some sort of savage. The cigarette means I'm having a nic fit. Now get the hell out of here.

VO: Are you sure you don't want to prance some more? I, uh, brought some colored beads. I thought you might, you know, work them into an intricate weaving of some sort, and then howl a bit. The kids really like the howling thing.

Ana: No, this is just silly. Get that camera out of my face.

VO: But...

Ana:OUT!

The camera wobbles a bit, then the picture breaks into static. Roll Credits.

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